Protect Our Borders

There was a recent news story about a group in Arizona referring to themselves as the Minutemen. It seems the group was made up of about 500 citizens who have decided to patrol the border independently to stop the floodgate of illegal immigrants at the border.
Now, that's all fine and good but I live in Michigan. I know the real immigration threat... Canadians!
You would not believe how easy it is for Canadians to reach their icy influence into our beloved country. For instance, did you know a Canadian frequents this site? That's right a Canadian is actually reading this blog... an American blog! Doesn't that worry you? What next? Will they be coming to Red Wing games (if the ever play again)?
I say enough is enough on our Northern border.
I am calling for the forming of... the Weekendmen. We don't really need to be ready in a minute because it's hard for them Canadians to move quickly through the snow, so I figure if we can get one or two people available on the weekends we'd be alright. Your commitment, if you join, would simply be to sign up for a weekend everyonce in a while, go to one of our borders with Canada, grab a bite to eat and if you run into anyone acting suspicious start screaming "CANADIAN" until they leave.
A few things to look for:
1) Somone wearing way to much flanel.
2) Mike Meyer t-shirts
3) People smelling of bacon
4) A pet beaver on a leash
5) Anyone grocery shopping in hockey gear
6) Bowl haircuts
7) Lumberjacks.
8) Tuques (If you don't know what this is, ask someone around you, if they know... CANADIAN!)
9) Anyone drinking milk out of a bag
Finally here's a general description:

So be a good American and sign up for the Weekendmen, eh?