Congratuations to Takeru Kobayashi of Japan for sucessfully defending his title at Nathan's Famous in Coney Island by consuming 49 Nathan's Famous hot dogs and buns in 12 minutes. That's right competitive eating is now a sport! Really... check out their site. It was freaking broadcast on ESPN!!! Finally, I can be considered an athlete. Take me to a mexican restaurant and they'll be charging admission to see a pro at the top of his game! The edorsements alone will make me rich. Move over Lance and Michael, a real athlete is on the scene.
In addition to the 50 hot dogs, Kobayashi ate 17.7 pounds of cow brains in 15 minutes (though not on the same day). Jed Donahue ate 152 jalapenos in 15 minutes. Bill Simmons ate 137 chicken wings in 30 minutes. Eric Booker ate 15 burritos in eight minutes and 38 hard-boiled eggs in 10 minutes. Crazy Legs Conti ate 168 oysters in 10 minutes. And Don Lerman ate seven quarter-pound sticks of butter in five minutes. He doesn't sweat, he oozes. His wife wipes him on her corn-on-the-cob.
We need to make some other natural activites competitive sports:
Competitive breathing: How many breaths can you take in 2 minutes before hyperventilating.
Competitive sitting: How many days can you stay in a recliner.
Competitive TIVO: Can you capture the entire run of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on your TIVO?
Competitive Silence: How long can you go speaking to no one?
Competitive Annoyer: How many people can you tick off in a given day?
Guarrantee I could kick all you're butts in any of these areas. Don't believe me? See you at the olympics!
5 comments:
I'd like to suggest some training in your competitive silence. Go for it, man.
I don't know where he got this reference but Fisher used to say in BT that many historians believed the fall of the Roman Empire could be directly attributed to the rise of their fascination with the trivial.
How is it that there are contests of gluttony when over eight million people will die this year because they do not have enough to eat?
Sorry, didn't mean to be a downer. Let's turn back to ESPN where we can watch the Scorpion Queen stay in a room with 6,069 scorpions for more than five days.
5 days! When's that on?
Here you go
Sorry, guess it is all over.
Oops. That wasn't even the right one.
Here is the 6069
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